Things we’ll miss, things we won’t

Ain’t had NO time to post! Wicked busy. We’re in full packing mode. Melissa’s a maniac…I figure if one of the cats sits still too long it will get taped up and boxed! Which may not be a bad idea. Just tape their little mouths shut, give ‘em a double-shot of Jack, and set them off in a 2-day FedEx box. Should get there just after we do.

Just kidding…I’m too cheap to pay the FedEx fees…

A 28 foot trailer will be dropped off for three days on Dec 22nd. ABF freight provides this. It’s actually 3 ‘business’ days, so that means we’ll have from Thu to Tue to pack. We fill up as much as we need, then install a full bulkhead they provide. They pick up the trailer, load up the rest of the space with commercial shipping stuff going to the same general area, and off they go. They drop off the commercial load, then leave the trailer with our stuff at our new address. And again we get three business days to unload.

As for us, we’re loading up the cats, the plants, and the fish (yes, the fish…gotta at least try) and heading down wicked early Fri Dec 29th. The plan is to make it to Fayetteville, NC before it gets dark, so figure around 12 hours at least. I went all out and booked us a room at the local EconoLodge, ice bucket not included.

We’ll have a couple of people watching the house here, plus the police. But it’s still a bit nerve-wracking. If we get a nasty storm and the power goes out, we won’t be there to crank the wood stove. So it would be nice if we could actually SELL the place! Hmmm…yeah…me thinks we’re in the same boat as a lot of other people, so at least we’re not alone. Can’t really complain…lots of people *need* to sell their house…we’re not in that unfortunate spot…yet.

I was trying to compile a list of the things we’d miss (besides family and friends, of course). What I quickly discovered is that it was loads easier to come up with things I *won’t*miss.

What I won’t miss:

Barking Dogs. I am PRAYING that we don’t have anywhere NEAR the problem with this when we get to Florida as we do now. I am so sick of dogs left outside to bark. At least the one house with the multitude of yippy dogs seems to have quieted down. This is most likely because the “wife” or whoever the hell she is has either moved out and taken her dogs with her, or her husband off’ed them to spite her. Which brings me to the second thing I won’t miss:

Screaming Neighbors. The lady I mentioned above was on her back deck on a cell phone screaming obscenities at whoever was on the other end (most likely her husband). I’m not sure what this guy did, but I assume he cheated on her or something as she was screaming bloody murder. Which goes right along with the neighbor next to her who ALSO has had a number of very loud screaming matches with her hubby, plus an incident where she tossed a sewing machine at her own kid during a fight. Nothing like a little trailer park trash to brighten up an otherwise peaceful ‘hood.

Ridiculously Loud People. Seeing a theme here? So we were outside Sat night enjoying a [clean burning] fire, when The Voice made an appearance. Think Jersey Shore. This woman has a set of chords that could travel through lead. And whatever they were doing likely involved some form of smoking, because she was talking and hacking like she was gargling phlegm, and saying classic stuff like “OH MY GAWD” in that stupid accent of hers.

Burning Shit. I have noticed something over the years as a result of driving in our area of town – our neighborhood is occupied by an abnormally high number of men who like to burn things. I’m not talking nice, dry wood as part of a family campfire. I’m talking things like trash, and rotten, wet leaves that can darken an entire swath of area with a toxic cloud. I have also noticed that one particular neighbor NEVER burns this crap when the wind is blowing TOWARDS his house. He only does it when it blows towards US. Douchbag.

Neighbor Dogs that “Get Loose”. Let’s get real, folks. They don’t usually “get loose”…you LET them loose, ya dumb-ass. Like the time our neighbor’s big sheep dog decided to pay a visit in our newly-seeded lawn. It had rained, and the 3-4 inches of topsoil was drenched. No matter…Mr. Sheep Dog happily trounced all over it. From the air it must have looked like one of those Family Circus cartoons where Mom sends Billy next door to get some sugar, and he wanders everywhere BUT next door. Deep dog prints were everywhere. Nice that we spent four grand getting a new lawn put in, and our dick-ass, inconsiderate neighbor let’s his mutt walk all over it. Oh, and to top it off he dropped a nice doggie deuce right in the middle. Yeah, won’t miss that!

Gunfire. I love being in the rural part of town, but I never expected the constant gunfire. I especially liked it when one of our close neighbors decided to get a gun too, and every Sunday morning he’d go out and squeeze off rapid-fire shots as fast as he could. So nice to see our pets scrambling for cover because they are scared. What kind of shit-for-brains does stuff like that???

Cars and Motorcycles. It always amazed me how much a passing Harley would drown out our conversations when the road was over 100 yards away, and through the woods. Thing is, that part of roadway is in a gulley, and I know the riders LOVED to rip open the throttle. I’ve seen the same crap when they go through tunnels. They get their stupid rocks off to that crap. And then there was the time the kid next door got a rice rocket and would be tearing through the neighborhood. We’d hear him going full-bore for miles after he left, probably hitting speeds above 80 on small back roads. If that were my kid I would have taken a sledge to the bike. And so what happens? Lo and behold, the kid gets into an accident and seriously hurts himself. Duh. Didn’t see that one coming at all. And let’s not forget the dude that owns the racecar…sure will miss listening to him sitting there revving his engine repeatedly all weekend long.

Leafblowers. OK, I realize I may not escape this. But hopefully it will at least happen during the day, and not so much on the weekends. One neighbor used his EVERY weekend. He was anal, and just had to blow his driveway and his decks and walkways. Had to. This idiot could not go one weekend without pulling the damn blower out for an hour+ at a time. During the fall it’s insane. Neighbor after neighbor out there all weekend long blowing leaves. And then burning them (but only when they were suitably wet, mind you). Heaven forbid anyone would want to sit outside and actually breathe.

Shop Vacs. Yeah, yeah, I know my issue is with noise. But really…*I* make noise too. Sometimes it’s necessary. I understand that. But the idiot who Shop Vac’s his stupid car every other weekend? Really? I’m not talking an antique Chevy he’s spiffing up for a Sunday car show. It’s his damn cheap-ass commuter. Dude, what the f do you need to vacuum that beater out so much for? WHY??? Put the damn vac DOWN!!!

Ug. I am so ready to be done with these inconsiderate morons. And move on to NEW inconsiderate morons! Hey, at least I recognize I’m anal and have issues. But I’m RESPECTFUL, damnit!

So what will we miss?

The Fires. We love to sit out when it’s quiet and calm and have a camp fire. Granted, it was rare to have a completely peaceful night not interrupted by lingering smell of burning, rotted leaves, barking dogs, swarming mosquitoes, or Jersey-ites coughing up a lung. But when the stars aligned it was really, really nice. Hopefully we can at least fire up the chiminea once in a while without pissing off a neighbor.

The House. Face it, we have done so much to the place, and we really love it there. And of course there are a ton of good memories. Plus Mickey and Cassie will always rest there. It will be very hard to say goodbye (assuming we can be heard over the barking dogs, leaf blowers, yelling, and the Harley’s).

The Area. It’s pretty, and we have done a lot right where we live, like the running and biking, taking the kayaks out, going out to eat. You know you’re at home when the wait staff at the local restaurant puts out your bottle of wine before you even ask for it.

The Birds. We’ve become quite attached to the various birds that often visit. I still love the story Melissa told about the time a woodpecker insisted on ringing the doorbell. And the bird who always wanted to be inside the house, constantly fluttering around the bay window (much to the entertainment of the cats).

Sushi in the Sun Room. It wasn’t always sushi, but that’s what we had there most often. It was so nice being in there with the big windows and the plants. Course we always kept an eye on Fred the Attack Plant to make sure he wasn’t making any moves.

My Whoopie

Today is a very special day. It is my whoopie pie’s first birthday! And I’m as proud as can be. My little whoopie has been a trooper all year long, sitting there hanging on my cube wall. Slowly (very slowly) oozing into a collapsed mess of artificial ingredients, sugars, and other FDA-approved crap.

It has bore sole witness to my every action in my cube this past year. Only it knows how many times I have yawned, how many times I have mouthed “What the fuck” when reading some dumb-ass email, and exactly how many times I have dug out a nose-nugget when no one was around.

A year ago today, I rescued my whoopie from a certain death. It came in a small case, along with other whoopies, all destined for some awful gastro-intestinal fate. They were a gift, if you could call it that, from a well-meaning vendor to one of the manager’s here. When I picked it out, it was like looking at a nursery, with each different whoopie all lined up.

This one spoke to me, so I had to have it. So I swaddled it, stuck a sticky on it that said “Dec 15, 2010″, and tacked it to my wall, where I could admire it every day.

Ahhh, so many memories. I remember its first drool, when just a smidge of its pretty raspberry filling began to ooze down into the low corner. I nearly cried. And when its cute little white government-nutritionist approved filling began to ooze too, I spent the morning taking pictures.
There were struggles too, of course. I tried to get it to make me a drawing for the fridge, or maybe take up soccer, but it refused. Then when the tattoo appeared, I thought it was all over…another punk-ass loser, I assumed.

But then it blossomed, spilling more of its inner soul. That tattoo was nothing more than a Marilyn Monroe beauty mark. It has settled down, and I could see a long and happy life together.

Alas, I am moving away. And I have decided that my little whoopie is too fragile to come with me. Oh how I would cry if it split open during our long journey, the fragrant aroma of its last gasps of breath stinging my eyes, and making me puke.

So it is with great sadness that I have found an adoptive soul…a fellow cube-dweller who has agreed to take my whoopie into his care, and to nurture it to its fullest potential, which will likely resemble a kind of edible Benjamin Button gone reverse, if you will.

It’s kind of sad that I never heard its little voice, never heard it coo. Which is probably good I guess, for if I had, it surely would have meant that the plastic wrap had broken, releasing a toxic goo probably quite similar to the acidic blood of the creature from those Aliens movies, burning through my desk, the floor, and taking out some critical servers in the computer room below. How ironic would it be that a whoopie pie, brought to us by some IT vendor who probably didn’t get the big contract they wanted, ended up taking out our data center with a single caustic ooze bomb.

But I digress. Family and friends, I give you my one-year-old whoopie:

Isn’t that mole the cutest thing!!

(And yes, in all seriousness, I am amazed that this thing *still* looks almost edible. WHAT THE HELL IS IN THERE!!!!!)

Such a good kitty

I bought a motion-detection security camera to help us keep an eye on the new house in Florida. It connects to the Internet, and sends out a picture of anything it detects moving.

Of course I needed to test it out, so I set it up at our current house. I put it in a place that I *knew* was guaranteed to see activity while we were gone at work – the kitchen counters, also known as “Luna’s Lick-My-Ass-Where-You-Prep-Your-Human-Food Playground”.

But, being the evil person I truly am, I also set up our compressed-air Scat cannister, the one that sprays out a sudden and loud air blast when it detects motion. Yup…motion-sensing camera AND motion-sensing cat terrorizer thingie. I was locked and loaded.

Sure enough, later that morning at work, I get an email alert that the camera has detected something. What do I see? Oh look…it’s Luna…prancing around on the counters where she KNOWS she’s not supposed to be. I am so very shocked by this behavior.

And then I get a second motion alert. Only this time, there’s NO KITTY!

Awwwwww…poor, shithead kitty got sprayed and went flying off the counter, not to be seen again for the rest of the day.

Darn. I feel terrible. I really do.

Right out of The Office

I brush my teeth at work. Some people think this is odd. I’ve noticed that the people who think this are odd themselves. And have yellow teeth. So I’m not overly worried about my work rep on this one.

But I have taken it to a slightly different level these days. I have a small bottle of mouth rinse, and just like at home I will now sip a little rinse before brushing. But at work it’s a little different. Here I take a sip AT MY DESK, and THEN head to the men’s room, after putting a little toothpaste on my brush. The thing is, I now have to get from “here to there”, which is not always easy.

So today I take a sip, but just then a guy walked by to the printer who I know likes to chat now and then. So I had to lay low for a bit until he went around the corner to the printer. I then got up, took a left, another left, a right, a left, and then I saw the cleaner cart outside the men’s room I usually use. It was closed for cleaning (damn lady cleans the room twelve times a day I swear)

I continued down the hall to the stairwell, which was occupied by another dude who likes to chit-chat. Luckily he was on the phone, but he stopped talking to say hi. I just gurgled a hello back at him and headed up the stairs.

When I got to the top I opened the door and went down the hall. As I neared the men’s room on this level, I saw the DO NOT ENTER yellow construction gate…I forgot that our “green” company was now re-constructing the men’s rooms to add a second crapper. I guess the reasoning at first was to limit the number of guys taking a dump so we can meet some formula for “less crap” going into the environment. Perhaps the number of us dudes getting frustrated and doing a deuce in the parking lot started to become an issue.

I had to turn around and head back down, but by now the Listerine in my mouth was starting to eat through my flesh, so I ducked into the mini break room on this level to spit it out in the sink. I had it just about ready to go when I noticed a lone woman standing on the far side out of the way, talking on her cell. I don’t know her…she doesn’t know me. I walked in, headed right for the sink like I was going to toss up last nights beef burrito, saw her, stopped for no apparent reason, and abruptly turned around. Yet another woman here who now thinks I am a complete retard no doubt.

I had no choice but to head back down, go past the dude chatting in the stairwell, past the cleaning lady, down the long hall, nodding and smiling at everyone I saw, until I got to the next men’s room. By this time I was ready to explode, and as a result I ended up splattering Listerine everywhere. I quickly brushed my teeth and left. As I went back down the hall, the cleaning lady was now heading towards the bathroom I just violated with overused mouth rinse spew. All I wanted to do was look at her and say “Bite me! This was all YOUR fault!” But I’m sure that would be hard to explain to HR.

An-ti-si-pay-shun

So once again we are sitting around..waiting. Waiting on service providers that never get back to you. At this time we are waiting to hear from:

• Our lender, the lawyer/closing agent, the current homeowners, our realtor up here in RI.

None of them have gotten back to us all day. Not one. I could call. Oh yes, I could call. And get voice mail for each and every one of them I am sure, or get a very curt response, like I’m “bothering” them. I swear I have never been put through such consistent and repeated lack-of-service in my life!

Nothing like sitting around wondering what, if anything is happening. Nothing like having soooo much hanging in the balance, and to get little more than tumble weeds slowly blowing across the dusty main street in town, not a living soul in sight. That’s what it feels like. And every time we think we’re set, we go through a quiet period, and then a last-minute reply comes in saying they “need this”, or we’re “missing that”.

So, as far as I know we’re still set to close, but it suuuuuure would be nice to hear that from the principles involved.

NYC…and WAITING!

We took off to NYC for one night last weekend. We try to do this every year but didn’t make it last time. Probably shouldn’t have gone/spent the money given that we’re trying to buy a house, but in the big picture it’s not a lot of cash, and we really needed to get away.

I know it seems odd to say we needed to get away when we’re (hopefully) on the verge of buying a new house and changing our lives, but this has not been fun. When we bought our house about 15 years ago, neither of us can recall being put through the ringer as much as we are now. We also remember it being a much clearer process. Maybe we’re just getting old, and I’m sure the fact that we’re buying a house that is far away isn’t helping, but this really has SUCKED!

And of course we’re still scrambling to get our current house ready to market. Every night and weekend is spent “doing things”. And I still have two biggies – replacing some roof shingles, and some siding shingles. They have obvious damage and it should be done. Do I want to get up on our roof and try and insert shingles in near-freezing weather? Um…NO!

Anyway, enough whining (ha…that will be the day). While we sit here yet again waiting for news on the new house (the appraisal this time, which is beyond a week overdue thankyouverymuch), here’s some notes from NYC.

Why is it that on a Peter Pan bus full of people, the ONLY moron coughing up a lung happens to be sitting RIGHT BEHIND US???

Ooops, that was more whining, wasn’t it…

“Body Work Foot Rub”…says it all eh?

 

Hmmm…in NYC there’s a post office that resembles a roman cathedral and occupies an entire city block. And the postal service is broke. Hmmmm. I wanted to go inside as I expected to see 100 customer service windows, but only one in service, with 300 hundred other dudes milling about in the background pretending to look busy.

 

“Wrapido!” I love cool store names. This, of course, is a sandwich shop.

 

A bronze cop with man-boobs. It really doesn’t get any better.

 

Our main goal was to check out the High Line elevated park. Cool place but man it was busy. This hotel allegedly had some issues with people being spotted having sex by the walkers below. I’m not sure I understand the issue…

 

This building doesn’t even look real. Love it.

 

This is one of the main viewing areas. Nicely done. You can sit stadium-style and watch the cars and people below. While they watch YOU, of course!

 

Only in NYC will you see fancy signs that highlight mundane things like doors! I wonder if there are more fancy signs inside, like “The Toilet”?

 

Our main goal was to once again check out progress at the new World Trade Center. This building was barely under way two years ago. Pretty cool.

 

When we checked in, we ended up on the 50th floor, which is way-sweet. Like two tourist geeks, we spent the first half-hour standing in the window bay taking pics.

 

We found out we needed to reserve access tickets to the actual memorial ahead of time. We couldn’t get any now, but this view is better to be honest.

 

It’s a maze down there. It’s crazy that this is actually controlled and planned construction!

 

We’ll have to come back so we can see this up close.

 

The elevator ride was a riot. More like an amusement drop than an elevator!

 

We had dinner at a place called Ninja. Look it up, it’s really cool. Very dark, with employees dressed as ninja’s, constantly “attacking” you when you least expect it. It starts with a short descent in an elevator, then a scary walk through some narrow, winding passages. Our table was enclosed in a small cubby with one sliding Asian-style door that half-covered the opening. Everything they did was some type of performance. We even had a guy do a private magic show that was excellent. No pics though. Too dark. And I might have been attacked if I tried.

Love this place. No fancy name. Just “BAR”. Come on in.

 

OK, so what if I back my car in, but I’m off a bit and I only made it to 59 degrees? Is there some meter maid wandering around with a protractor?

 

Cool fountain near WTC site.

 

Of course we tried to take night pics through the hotel room window. That combined with alcohol intake usually spells out doom for that thing called “focus”. One cool thing is how this building appears opaque during the day, but at night you can see right through it.

 

And I *finally* got a good pic of that stupid clock across the river! Been trying for years!

 

Always a nice view at night.

 

When we first started coming here after 9/11, you could see so much of the original foundation. Now this is all that remains.

 

Occupy Wall Street…they were beating drums ALL NIGHT. Note to protestors – you want my sympathy and support? Start by not being inconsiderate DICKWADS!

 

So many cops, so few donuts.

 

OK, time for a creative shot.

 

Hmmm…why is it not cool to swim in the river? Oh yeah, now I remember.

 

What the HELL do you do when a dog this size takes a dump? Do you carry 30-gallon Glad bags around, and a shovel? Seriously sister, get a chow, or a poodle for cryin’ out loud.

 

This is kinda neat because this pic is basically the same view angle of both the city mock-up, and the actual view in the background. This is looking south-southwest. The statue of liberty would be to the left a bit. In the model, the Brooklyn Bridge is on the left. It would be nice to see the old towers in this though…

 

We walked past a skate park, and I took some random shots. Kind of funky and fun!

 

 

 

 

 

D’Agostino, baby! Watch your ass!!

 

As we walked back along the rest of the high-line, we made our way down to get lunch. This was the trip that will be remembered for NOT being able to find a damn place to eat. In NYC!!! I remember places to eat EVERYWHERE! Not this time. But eventually we found a spot. But not after passing through some colorful areas. Love this funky door scene.

 

The odd crap people put in their windows amazes me. And makes me to never ever want to meet any of these folks! So your poodle came from Area 51? Or are you saying that the aliens they captured resemble poodles? Or maybe your just a whack job…

Something tells me it would be a blast to be in NYC for Halloween.

I guess if you live here, having some commando-style protection for your car lights is a must!

All this talk of the High Line, and I really didn’t post any pics yet. This was just before we spotted the topless woman. Hey, whatever.

The bus ride back was mostly uneventful. But again we ended up with the one odd-ball right behind us. The driver announces at the start to NOT talk on your cell phone unless it’s an emergency. So what does the dork-meister being us do? He starts chatting! Right at the point when most of us have dozed off! Can’t we just toss idiots like that out the window??

Yeeeeeeeee Hawwwwwwww!!!!

It’s official, we’ll be Florida-bound just as soon as we can sell our house here. We signed a contract on a cool place in Parrish.

 

Now just gotta get there. We’re still waiting for the appraisal on the new place. Here’s the deal – the bank is willing to give us the money we need to buy the house, BUT, if the appraised value comes in less than the purchase price we are paying, then the bank will only give us a loan for the appraised “lesser” value. That means “somebody” will have to give. Either the sellers have to lower their price, or we have to come up with more cash. We ain’t gots no mo’ cash, so if it gets to that point and we can’t get them to lower the price, then we’re toast. Simple as that. So if you want to know what is keeping us up at night, there’s a biggie. Appraisal is supposed to happen soon, so we’ll see.

Meanwhile, we have been working like dogs to get our current house ready to market. The list of items to do is still long, but at least it’s going down. Some biggies are done or underway, so that’s cool. I just wish this had all happened earlier because it’s too close to Christmas…we doubt it will be a good time to try and sell. And if it doesn’t sell quick, then we’re facing a long winter, waiting for better weather when it is more likely to sell. Meanwhile, the house in FL will sit vacant. Not cool.

Anyway, one big items was to get a bunch of ugly tree stumps removed, and get the driveway spiffed up. It has really taken a beating over the years. So we had our buddy Dave Belanger come over, and he tore it up good! I set up the video camera on time-lapse. The montage below covers about four hours of video. Cool stuff.

[Youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k24sxFN2STQ]

Ocean’s Run

We “jogged” the Ocean’s Run ½ Marathon on Sun the 25th. Nicole and Laura were in it so we figured we’d tag along. I can’t really say we “run” races anymore…it’s more like a casual jog lately! I used to know that I could break into a run if I ever had to, now I’m not so sure. Will the back give out? Will a foot cramp up? Will I run in the wrong direction? Haha, ok so not *that* bad. Not yet anyway.

We stayed at the Charlestown, RI version of the Bates Motel. In this incarnation it’s called the Surfside. I think Charlestown is an enigma. You search for almost anything there in Google and you get very sparse results. Like hotels…ain’t nuthin’ but the Bates place…I mean the Surfside. Same for restaurants. A couple of pizza joints and a Dunkin Donuts. Maybe a lonely vending machine outside Earl’s Gas n’ Guns where you can get a 10-year-old bag of Planters peanuts perhaps, assuming the pull handle doesn’t jam. And you have exact change.

And yet the towns all around it are buzzing with all kinds of good stuff. Ahh yes…Charlestown…The Land That Class Forgot.

When we checked in, you had to press a call button. The dude that showed up was scary enough that I found myself checking the property for indications of fresh grave sites. Or the tell-tale sign that heels make when a body is being dragged across the lawn. I asked him if there were any good restaurants in the area. He just smiled and said, Well, there’s Earl’s up around the bend there.”

Our room was #12, on the second floor. It was right next to room #13, which I really thought you weren’t supposed to have if you ran a hotel. I noticed it wasn’t occupied, except for the fact that a majority of those late summer spiders with their fat abdomens were clustered around it, like it was their “home”.

The room was simple enough, but the bed was torture. I don’t know what was inside but it reminded me of crushed up, softened human bones. You couldn’t move an inch on this thing without it making a weird crunching noise.

We met up with the others and headed out to dinner at a place farther down the road. It was getting dark, and road signs were about as rare as finding any locals with a full set of teeth. After one U-turn and a trip down some odd side roads that twisted in and out of each other, we found the place.

They herded us to a back corner out of sight of most of the other patrons, as if the place wasn’t used to having outsiders. I noticed the wide wooden floorboards were worn to a polished sheen, and again I thought of bodies being dragged along them, smooth after years of washing the blood away.

A waitress appeared…an older woman who seemed like she had just emerged from some cracked black and white photograph of her in a casket. The undead. She took our order, and when my meal arrived I noticed how carefully she placed my steak knife next to my plate. She smiled as she leaned in and said, “If you need a bigger knife, we have plenty of them in the back. Very SHARP ones.” I politely declined and made a mental note to not nick myself, as I wasn’t sure what the sight of blood might do in a place like this.

OK…sorry but gotta stop being a goof ball and get back to posting some damn pics!!!

We got to the place just fine. Had to be bussed in though. Wow, last time I was on a school bus I think I was vandalizing it! Haha, just kidding.

 

I felt a little funny without a shirt, but I knew it was going to be hot. Not much sun, but humidity was way up.

 

I had a feeling the turnout was expected to be bigger! Oh well.

 

Everyone was kind of making fun of the fact that it was called “Ocean’s Run”, when in fact you saw very little of it. More like the “Just out of sight of the ocean run”. But it was still beautiful.

 

The volunteers are always great. Power to them, baby…not sure I’d have any interest in spending my weekend morning handing out drinks to sweaty people in Spandex.

 

Gooooooo Melissa!

 

Not a great shot of the girls, but at least they’re smiling.

 

Nice to see vulture-like birds hanging around, hoping for a morning “runner” snack. He’s on top of the chimney. Wonder if this is where Earl lives?

 

This is the ultimate winner I think. The course doubled back a lot. This dude was so far ahead of me it wasn’t even funny. He could have started the race again at the end and lapped me probably. Jerk. I mean, “Great race!” Jerk.

 

Buzzzzz!!! Damn paparazzi are everywhere.

 

People always get a kick out of seeing a runner with his own camera!

 

Sums it up…body falling apart…held together by some Gu.

 

Crowds were sparse but at least there were some.

 

The finish!! Didn’t know it was going to be “over the river and through the woods” though. Too funny.

 

Nicole beats Mom…how about that.

 

But she was close behind.

And right after that was Laura!

 

Tada! Now where’s that free beer???

 

Ahhhhhh…at least it was free.

 

Beer good. Running bad.

 

“Half” way there…hahahaha.

Block Island, Dancing, and Florida…Oh My!

Haven’t posted in a while. It has been a bit of a whirlwind at the old ranch. Went to Block Island…went dancing…split up a crapload of wood. But mostly we have been making plans to move. Yup, the stars have (mostly) aligned and we hope to be in Florida in time for Spring Training next year.

There’s a lot that still has to come together, but most of it is within our own control. The main thing right now is getting the house souped up as much as possible. Things like removing the clutter, finishing up any remaining projects, mounting the cats on the wall so they don’t interfere with any prospective buyers. This in itself is a lot of work, but we’re already in full swing.

The market in Florida is, of course, in shambles (for sellers that is). For us as buyers we’re actually overwhelmed by all the choices. After a while we get cross-eyed with it all. Sometimes you just want to say ‘screw it’, close your eyes, and throw a dart at a map of houses. It’s almost as if you can’t go wrong.

We started out simply enough – a modest place with three beds and two baths. HAHAHAHAHA…”Search Results Found: 8 billion”. At this point we could probably specify something like “3 beds with two having walk in closets, all on the same level, one with dual east/south exposure, 2 baths with imported Italian tile and Greek-inspired faucets with radiant floor heating and 6-way showers with full stereos and TV’s in each, a four-car garage with two on one side combined, and the other two dedicated, Mexican roof tiles, kitchen with light Ash cabinets with cherry trim features, a stainless steel fridge that makes daiquiris, island with its own sink, a custom wine storage cabinet, granite (of course), a walk-in pantry that could house a family from Guatamala, a custom pool with integrated Jacuzzi (all of it heated of course), and the whole thing is mounted on a rotating carousel for ever-changing views as we swim”, and *still* get a ton of results. You almost have to get to the point of saying “And our realtor has to be name Stan and he needs to be a former pitcher for the Red Sox farm league. And he drives a Honda.” That will drop the results to, oh, about 300.

I do feel bad because you have to wonder how many dreams have gone by the wayside in a market this bad. But at the same time we’d be going there and adding our incomes to the local scene, which is a good thing overall.

As part of this I have also made the crazy request to be allowed to work remotely from home full-time. Not sure of my chances but figure they are below 50%. This place simply does not do telecommuting. It’s not in their psyche. So, I have gone out on a limb a bit, but can’t hurt to ask. If the answer is no, then they lose a good employee. And then I have to find a job down there, which hopefully won’t be too bad…I have been looking and there are definitely some options for me.

But, no sense wondering too much about what *could* be. So time to write about what *was*, and first up is Block Island! We took Friday off work and got up early to catch the first ferry. Soooo different than going on a weekend…we had the boat to ourselves.

This is kind of a funky shot because when they fired up the engines, they pretty much blasted this fishing boat.

 

And maybe it’s me, but if you want to make sure your boat doesn’t go for a ride by itself, I’m thinking you should do a better job of tying it up.

 

The seagulls apparently love to hang out on this pilot house.

 

Which reminds me…I don’t have any pics, but when we pulled up to park our car, the woman there was almost buried by seagulls. She was feeding them, which is really insane. Anyone who knows these things know you do NOT feed the gulls. All of the cars parked within a fifty foot radius of this woman were covered in various splotches of multi-colored seagull poop. Some of the cars must have been there for a few days at least as they were more poop than car. And this woman is laughing! Oh my…we parked far away, but I still got nailed twice.

Our luck was good because there had been rain leading up to this day, and there was rain coming after. Couldn’t have worked out any better. The beginning of the ride out was perfect.

When we got to the sound, we hit some waves. Thing is we were in the back, and normally the front of the boat rises more. But this was the fast cat, and so the whole puppy rode the wave. At one point I went airborne as the deck fell out from under me. Same thing happened to some guys standing near us. I fell back and grabbed the back of one of the bench seats, which promptly flipped right up! Apparently they flip forward to give access to the life vests. One of the guys next to us “fell” into a seated position on another bench.

We laughed, but it was kind of scary. For the rest of the ride I pretended I was surfing and tried to ride out the big swells. I’m sure I looked like one of Jerry’s Kid’s but as usual I really didn’t care.

The island really is beautiful.

As is the ride.

We grabbed our bikes and headed to the beach. I never get tired of these scenes.

Yup, here we are again, on the Block.

Mount Block Island…hahaha.

Beach was crowded as usual.

At one point some weird guy carrying two backpacks was wandering up and down. He eventually settled down the beach from us. And then got naked. Did I mention he was fat? Melissa says we have seen him before. I probably block it out.

The waves were excellent. I crouched low to get a side shot, and completely missed a wave that came in. I pulled up just before my camera became a sea specimen.

A couple showed up and the guy went surfing, so I grabbed a few shots.

We rode back for lunch at the National, which was excellent as always. Then we shopped for a bit, and ended up at Ballard’s. Pretty cool as they had a guy playing guitar and singing, and two women goofing around with hula hoops in front. They were actually quite good. Every time I see someone doing that I want to try.

After that it was time to head home. No hot dogs on the boat, but that’s OK…we ate and drank like cows at lunch anyway.

As for THIS weekend, we spent a lot of time doing chores. That is likely going to be a theme now that we have decided to sell our house. Sat was the big day as we had to get all of our firewood split up and stacked. We had ten trees taken down this year. It took us all day to do the splitting. Melissa was a trooper…she kept rolling the logs to me. Worked out great because we rented a vertical splitter this year, so no need to lift the logs very far at all.

Hard to see but that’s THREE rows of logs there.

 

This was by early afternoon.

 

Tada!

 

At this point we were pretty much just zombies, so I said we should do zombie faces.

 

The thing is, this is the LAST year we’ll be doing this

Isla Mujeres 2011 – Last Day :(

Sat Jul 30, 2011

We went back to Isla Mujeres, an island north-west of the Cancun resort area. We stayed for nine beer/wine/food/adventure-filled days. This is Day 10 (last day) of our trip report.

Well, this is it. Last day. After some quick coffee, we headed out for one last dip in the ocean. As we headed down the stairs, I looked down on the vampire house and noticed some movement. It was one of the dogs. I figure they are the “familiars”. And check it out…this one’s packin’…that’s a small gun laying next to him! Armed dogs. That’s a new one!

We headed to Sunset Grill and quietly watched the morning begin, while we thought about going home. Seeing boats like this reminded me of going to Rose Island in Dad’s old boat.

It’s a conga line…in the water!

On the way back, we went up to the seventh floor to check out the view. Pretty sweet. This is looking south, with the vampire house directly below. Hidalgo runs straight south starting at the top-left corner of the cemetery.

This is looking east towards the ocean side.

This is a zoom in of the same view, showing the top of Hotel Secreto. It’s too bad there’s that uncompleted development right next to it. It really is beautiful over there though. Not much of a beach but there are nooks where you can go sit and cool off. We’ve considered staying here.

And this is south west, looking right at Privilege Aluxes.

This is north west, with the mainland in the background and Nautibeach in the foreground.

I really like the old ferry that runs back and forth. The sound was kind of quaint to me. Not sure I would have enjoyed it so much if it ran right by our hotel however!

This is a zoom in on Hidalgo. You can just see the cemetery in the bottom-right.

Sigh…one last look at the ferry dock before the boat pulls away.

The lucky people going TO the island. That was us nine days ago!

These folks sat down in front of us. Kind of took away the view, as you can see. The perfume/cologne didn’t help either. Not sure why we didn’t just get up and move. Probably just delirious due to end of vacation-itis.

Saw an armed guard inside the general store in Puerto Juarez! But it was just because there was an armored truck pick-up or drop-off.

As I feared, once again our “private” van service to the airport wasn’t private after all. Guess I wouldn’t mind except that we had to catch our flight, but we couldn’t leave because two additional people were missing (again…wtf?). Turns out it was two women who looked like they had stopped for ice cream or something. Can you say “bitch-slap”? Get your dumb-asses in the van!!!

Then to make it worse, as usual the driver was a tailgater. Can’t stand that. This pic looks harmless, except for the fact that we were on the highway doing around 45-50mph at the time. Not a cool way to ease back to reality after a nice vacation.

We stopped for our customary beers once we got to the airport. Place was a mob-scene as usual.

But hey, the beer was nice and cold.

The flight back home was fine. The woman next to me was over-the-edge neurotic, but she didn’t affect me. We got through customs fine, albeit slowly (our customs dude was a chatty Kathy). We eventually found “Vinny”, our driver, and made it to the house. Officially back to reality.

When we got up the next day and started checking the house out, not only were the deer flies still buzzing around…

But the damn cicada killer wasps had moved in! I killed at least 25 of them, and there’s more to go. Here are a couple of the bigger ones.

At least there are also some cool dragonflies hanging around. Too bad they don’t eat deer flies and killer wasps!

And hey, Bloodsport was on TV, which was kind of ironic since at one point during vacation we were totally making fun of Claude Van Damme and his terrible acting in this very same movie. “HUAHHHHHHH!!!!!”

Now to start planning for NEXT July…hehe.